Does It Help or Hinder? Technology and Its Role in Healing Post Affair

• Published in: Journal of couple & relationship therapy Vol. 16; no. 1; pp. 42 - 60
• Main Authors: Brimhall, Andrew S., Miller, Bobbi J., Maxwell, Kelly A., Alotaiby, Asmaa M.
• Format: Journal Article
• Language: English
• Published: Abingdon Routledge 02-01-2017; Taylor & Francis Ltd
• Subjects: Adultery; attachment theory; couple interactions; Couples; couples therapy; infidelity; Information technology; Marriage counseling; Technology; Therapy
• ISSN: 1533-2691; 1533-2683
• DOI: 10.1080/15332691.2016.1142408

For couples experiencing infidelity, technology can be either a source of comfort or a constant threat. Technology has created an atmosphere where individuals have access to more people, in more ways, and at more times than ever before. While this accessibility has increased partners' ability to connect with each other, it has also increased opportunities for infidelity and makes it easier to maintain an affair. From an attachment perspective, infidelity can lead to heightened sensitivities that alter how an individual experiences the availability, responsiveness, and engagement of their partner. Everyday interactions like text messages, phone calls, and computer use become potential threats that compromise the safety of the relationship. Using an extensive clinical vignette, this article highlights the systemic relationship between technology, attachment, and infidelity and provides clinicians with a framework to use when helping couples heal post affair.